They say you don’t truly understand someone’s journey until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes. Well, I didn’t just walk—I ran, stumbled, crawled, and at times, collapsed in mine. And those shoes? They weren’t the stylish, red-soled kind I prefer. They were battered, worn down by heartbreak, and carried the weight of a past I didn’t choose but one that ultimately shaped me.
Failure, or what the world sees as failure, has a way of branding itself onto your soul. For me, it came in the form of domestic violence—a chapter in my story that I never wrote willingly but one that became a turning point. In the thick of it, I felt lost, broken, and like I had made all the wrong choices. How did I, a woman who prided herself on strength, independence, and a keen ability to spot red flags, find myself in a situation that stripped me of my voice?
I used to think failure was about losing—a business that didn’t take off, a missed opportunity, a door that refused to open no matter how hard I knocked. But failure, real failure, is when you start believing you are the problem. And that’s what abuse does—it rewires your brain, convinces you that you deserve the pain, and forces you into survival mode so deep that you forget who you were before it all began.
But here’s the twist: That “failure” was the very thing that led me to where I am today. It made me an advocate, a voice for women who feel trapped in their own unwritten chapters. It forced me to rebuild myself from the ground up, piece by piece, stronger than before. It turned my pain into purpose, my silence into strength, and my past into a platform.
I don’t sugarcoat my journey, nor do I wrap it in an inspirational bow. Surviving something that nearly crushed you isn’t pretty—it’s messy, exhausting, and at times, lonely. But it’s also transformative. The mile I walked in those worn-down shoes gave me the power to help other women lace up their own and step into a future where they are no longer afraid.
So, has failure set me up for success? Absolutely. It taught me resilience, clarity, and an unwavering determination to never let another woman feel alone in the dark. If I could tell my past self anything, it would be this: You didn’t fail. You fought. And that fight? It made you unstoppable.
To every woman still walking that mile—you are not alone. And when you’re ready, I’ll be right here, cheering you on.
Resources for Women Seeking Help
If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, help is available:
🔹 National Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 800-799-7233 or text START to 88788 (24/7, confidential)
🔹 Love Is Respect: Focused on young adult relationships – Call 866-331-9474 or text LOVEIS to 22522
🔹 Women’s Law: https://www.womenslaw.org/ (Legal resources for survivors)
🔹 The Hotline for International Support: https://www.hotpeachpages.net/
You are never alone. There is always a way forward. đź’ś
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